Welcome to the first of (maybe) three lists featuring the Sexiest Men of 2013! This one is compiled of nothing more than the most popular Quickie posts of the year. If you have a problem with who’s on here, don’t blame me for the rankings! It’s your own damn fault for clicking, “reading” and voting for these guys over and over again on The Ten.
Oh, I’m just kidding! It’s your prerogative to bitch and complain all you want. This list is a bit, um, monochromatic and far from perfect in other ways. Because of this, I’m currently working on a final countdown of “Editor’s Picks” who didn’t make it onto any of our Best of xhardxtimesx.ru roundups for whatever reason. Feel free to leave suggestions in the comments.
Take a look at the best Quickie posts of 2013 below:
10. CHRIS BAILEY:
We wrote: “Here’s some thoughts that come to mind while looking at these pics of Australian model Chris Bailey: Is it really so bad to fake a terminal illness, find some sort of Make-A-Wish organization for adults, and wish for one night with him? Is kidnapping and keeping a hot male model as a 24-7 sex toy AS bad as faking a terminal illness and conning a Make-A-Wish organization for adults? Does he know just how perfect his cock’s outline through that underwear is?”
9. SERGE HENIR:
We wrote: “It’s hard to believe that there are really people who look like that in the world. You know if you’re a little insecure and some insanely hot guy can make you feel like ‘ugh, I = chopped liver’. But Serge Henir is so hot that he’s almost fiction. You just kinda have to build an altar, get on your knees, and worship. He’s like a whole other category of man.”
We wrote: “The hottest pics of male model Jay Anthony Parks in this bunch are the earlier ones. The ones where he looks a bit scruffy, and like he was just starting out. And needed to pay some bills. And those briefs are off, and barely covering his junk. You can imagine what went on (in my mind)”
7. WILL GRANT:
We wrote: “ is a champion BMX rider, certified personal trainer, and male model. He can pop a wheelie, instruct you on how to work out your ‘lats’ and look way fuckable while doing all of that. I wonder if he’s straight. I’m getting a straight vibe from him, but I’ve been known to be (happily) wrong in the past. He could be gay.”
6. WOODY FOX:
We wrote: “Most of you have already seen Woody Fox naked and/or working his uncut cock into an eager bottom’s hungry hole. If you’re among that group—or if you just clicked any of the links in the last sentence—the pics in today’s Quickie post won’t show you anything you haven’t seen before… Except for maybe a little more personality and humor than your average gay porn shoot.”
We wrote: “Oh gosh! Another unbelievably gorgeous model like Aiden, Luca or Maddox? How could we do this to you?!?! On behalf of xhardxtimesx.ru and the entirety of headquarters, I would just like to personally apologize for forcing you to look at Gage‘s handsome face, lean torso and solid muscle ass. I’m sorry to offend your eyes with a man who has hair in all of the right places and armpits that we could live in. And don’t worry! I understand if you can’t forgive us.”
4. KIRILL DOWIDOFF:
We wrote: “Some of you will think Kirill Dowidoff is the most beautiful man you’ve ever seen. A whole other group of you will dismiss the Russian model as ‘another generic gym bunny Ken doll’. Well, we can’t please all of you, so this posts goes out to the folks who can appreciate a handsome face, a chiseled torso and a butt that’s begging to be grabbed (among other things).”
3. EVAN WADLE:
We wrote: “My younger brother once brought his entire fraternity pledge class home for a weekend, and I just happened to be visiting home as well. Ok, I totally planned it. Anyway, the majority of them were hot but (assuming they were straight) I held myself in check. Except for this one guy… He looked EXACTLY like Evan Wadle. Like mirror image. Maybe it was Evan Wadle! Anyway, nothing much happened. Although that Saturday night he came home drunk, and I came home drunk, and he thought it necessary to let me know he was cool around gays.”
We wrote: “Randy here has a yeti butt, not a cub butt. He’s also got a thick uncut cock that I wouldn’t mind wrapping my mouth (or ass) around. However, something tells me he’ll sooner be putting his backside to work in a hardcore scene for , and by something, I mean the seventeen fingers he shoves up his hole in this solo scene. Let’s hope he’s versatile! It’d be a shame if nobody got to swirl their tongue around that foreskin.”
1. SAUL HARRIS:
We wrote: “It amuses us that Saul Harris was literally put on a pedestal by one of his photographers. The one-time model, who went by the name of Hudson on their site, was quite popular here on xhardxtimesx.ru, holding the title of ‘Sexiest Man of The Moment’ for seven consecutive weeks. With his muscular build, fuzzy torso and mouthwatering equipment, we have a sneaking suspicion he’ll make it onto several of our year-end lists.”
EDITOR’S NOTE: And we weren’t wrong! He had the second-best cock of the year.