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A HOUSE FULL OF SLUTS, SOMEWHERE – As the editor of xhardxtimesx.ru is far too busy continuing his total diva meltdown by making nasty, inappropriate and highly unprofessional comments about , and on a website called , you are fortunate to have ‘s most reliable and dedicated employee Gay Journalist bringing you the hard-hitting news that you so desperately crave in your face-holes.

The man announced as 2014’s Hottest Cock Slut—known by the pseudonym Eli Hunter—was spotted taking multiple bareback loads with several attractive acquaintances on a website called . In all attempts to contact the residence for an official comment, phone calls were greeted by the sound of slurping, gargling, smacking and a woman shouting about her children.

More on this story as it develops! And I would just like to remind that I am available for hire if you ever want to fire that shady Dewitt character and replace him with a writer who has actual talent and credibility.

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