Vintage Gold: Centurians of Rome

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The history of this John Christopher classic,  [sic], is almost more interesting than the movie itself. The legend goes that this film was actually funded by robbing a Brink’s security guard to the tune of almost 2 million dollars.  Lloyd’s of London even filed a claim for partial ownership of this movie, and the title went down in history as the most expensive gay porn ever produced, by 1981 standards.  Check out this storyline:

Demetrius and Octavius are Roman countrymen sold into slavery for not paying their taxes during Emperor ‘s reign. Demetrius is purchased by the Emperor and taught to be a “good slave” by Argus while Octavius is claimed by a sadistic commander. The commander wants the bound Demetrius but is refused. Octavius sneaks in while the guards are asleep and frees Demetrius.

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Yaas!  Slaves? Taxes? Sadistic Commanders? ALL the things!

Thank goodness for RetroMales bringing this back up to my attention because I might never have seen it otherwise!  I’m gonna include parts 1 and 2 in this post so you can really get a feel for all of the work and thought that went into creating this masterpiece (note the purloined Star Wars title sequence):

That was shockingly hot. And also pretty weird. But also hot. I’m trying to figure out where I can buy one of these ‘may as well be naked’ roman underpants/loincloths. Watch part two while I do that:

I mean, right??? That’s intense! They actually made a whole set and got costumes and wrote a script! What the hell, today’s porn!? Where’s the 2016 equivalent of this?!

You can watch the entire film at RetroMales (in addition to a bunch of other shockingly sexy shit).

I don’t think I’m gonna be able to enjoy any modern stuff for the rest of the day. :/

– tyler


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