As we wind down our calendar year for 2014, we are thrilled for all of the major accomplishments that equality has made worldwide. However, we’d be remissed if we didn’t discuss who earned a spot on our Biggest Dicks of 2014 list. No, not quite as adult as you may have imagined (apologies to Tommy Defendi, Mick Lovell and whatever porn star you’d like to think of when saying ‘big dick’).
Instead, today we celebrate those that inspire us to scream at our iPhone as we scour headlines or send a link to our bestie to remind them that their boss really isn’t that bad. Yes kids, today we are discussing pricks, dick heads and all those that we love to hate.
We introduce you to our annual Biggest Dicks of 2014 countdown:
Rape, slander, lies, hiding, attorney fees… And that’s just this month.
Beating up your kids and justifying it as discipline? No, no, no! ‘Nuff said.
Most people whom enjoy their food at a local mom and pop shop tend to appreciate their service by tipping generously, unlike Harvard Professor Ben Edelman, whom arguably took the exact opposite approach. Instead, he went to the Chinese food restaurant website, discovered he was overcharged and reported the owner to the authorities.
The amount the bill was off by? Four dollars! Luckily, HBS students have created a campaign to showcase their support, but Professor Edelman earns a great spot on our Biggest Dicks of 2014 list with this prick move. Oh, and his thought on the food? “Delicious” – unlike his mug shot attached to the article.
7. RAY RICE:
Beating up your girl on camera? No, no, no! ‘Nuff said.
President of Gordon College D. Michael Lindsay was among 14 religious leaders who wrote to the White House requesting an exemption to an upcoming executive order prohibiting federal contractors from discriminating in their hiring based on sexual orientation or gender identity. Luckily, local bewitching Salem Mayor cut ties with the college to make a stand and even offered personal money to match all anti-LGBT calls to the city.
A security guard asked two gay men, ages 18 and 19, to leave the Burger King in Madrid’s Plaza de los Cubos last month after a patron who was eating there with his kids complained about them kissing, according to El Pais. In response to this, protesters gathered to stage a at a Burger King franchise in Spain Saturday.
Originally heralded as part of the ‘world’s largest gay power couple’, Hughes and his boyfriend have overseen an incredible year of loss, including a 30 point defeat for his political ambitions and a practical death blow for the former journalistic giant The New Republic after a wave of criticism has seeped in. Using gay and power should only refer to power bottom, and thus we decry Mr. Hughes for his public failures on changing the world to be a better, gayer place for us all.
Know that Russian name? Nyet? Well, Mr. Dogopov is apparently the slave puppy to Mr. Vladmir Putin, as his organization, ZEFS, took down the Steve Jobs memorial iPhone display honoring said tech genius after current Apple CEO Tim Cook came out and advocated for LGBT rights earlier this year. A ZEFS statement said it was required to abide by a 2013 Russian law outlawing “homosexual propaganda” directed at minors. The monument was in clear view of the students at the college.
Cairo police recently arrest nearly 40 spa guests, all of whom were naked, afraid and confused, under the guise that the bathhouse owner was being accused of immoral and indecent conduct. Evidently, police were using social media sites and mobile apps like Grindr to find their prey. Though Grindr now showcases how far off their members are, apps like have eased the process to hide exact GPS metrics to better protect their members. All the same, anyone joining these sites to prey on others need to fuck off, permanently
1. ALL GRAND JURIES WEIGHING IN ON RACIAL ISSUES: